You know what I have learned so far on my journey to love. No matter how much a person wants to be loved. Till they learn to love themselves they will not be able to accept true love of any form. Its a slap in the face when you try to show love to someone who truly craves it, but when they stuck in there own ways. It’s pointless and heartbreaking.
~TO BE CONTINUED~
When are you going wake up
And see I dont want anything from you.
All I want is your time and heart.
Im not asking for your change.
You got a woman who cares for you
Spiritual, mental and emotionally
When you going wake up
To see Im not here for the fame
Im not here for your money
Im here cause I care.
I worry for you
Can you sense it?
I done fought for you so long
When are you going to wake up?
I dont fight
I just walk
But you made a mark in my life
Damn
Maybe I need a wake-up
And see you trying let old you come to play
Im stubborn and like learn on my own
Me waking up
It is like you taking heed to what im saying.
Can you feel what im saying?
4.4.20
~PJ~
A poem dedicated to poetry month and for yesterday and today. Welcome to my crazy love journey. Looks like I’m telling my story backward. Do enjoy and God Bless
I never knew how deep my love.
Could be for another man
Its crazy cause after the last
I was done with fuckery and
Knew damn well my heart couldn’t
Be touch again after shutting down
After my last mistake
That really took me back to the old
Me.
Cold-hearted
But you..
What can I say..
Our first interaction was EPIC!!!
Till this day I can’t get it out my head.
Damn a TAURUS at that
That should have been a warning
But im stubborn and warnings is
Like a GO for me.
I can name other reasons
But what’s the point.
I love how you became a person
I could count on without me realizing it
I love how you sneak your way in
Without me knowing I cared for you
I love you for many reasons
For staying when you should have a walk
From get-go
For fighting for me as you say.
I plead 5 on that.
But I give it to you.
Never thought I’ll meet someone worth
Fighting for
Im selfish
I want you to myself
But I can’t have you to myself
3.24.20
~PJ~
Do enjoy and let me know what you think. Going to add it to My Love Journey. God Bless
My heart hurts so bad right now
I done made the biggest mistake
And fallen for a man
Who only thought of me
As a chess piece
The time I needed to be strong
I fail myself
Im standing in the rain
With a broken heart
Im a Queen
In dire need
If you see me walking with
Head hanging down
Please mind your own business
Im dealing with my lost
One after another.
I need to go back to the time things
Was simpler and remember my damn
Place.
God will give it to you
And take it away.
Im dealing with my lost
And having a talk with my master
Let me do this alone.
He never left me when I had it all
And didnt know how to act.
Dealing with heartbreak when
The world going thru pandemic
It seems so trivial.
To worry about a Lil heartbreak.
When God is showing me a bigger
Pic
4.1.20
~PJ~
Hope you enjoy. I have been working on this piece for over a month. Glad to finish it for poetry month. Do let me know what y’all think. God Bless
I need you
I need you for reasons you cant imagine
I need you on days I want to throw in the towel
I need you even when you give me hell
I need you
Baby
I need you as much as you need me.
Needing you has become part of me
Hearing your voice reminds me just how much i need you
Healing you
Is what you need
I need you
To be ready to love me
Without your past pulling you in
To be ready break down walls
Baby
I need you
Im needing You
More and more
While needing you
I’m hurting you and us
I need you
On days I’m fighting
To not express how I feel
On days saying enough can get me by
I need you
Understand
I’m struggling on you loving me
And me letting your love heal
What’s so damage
That I’m ashamed of my brokeness
I need you
2.8.9.20
~PJ~
A new poem dedicated to My Love Journey and emotions. Do enjoy an der me know what you think. God Bless
Dating with chronic illness. When do you let them know about it? I always have kept it to myself for so many years. The last person that was in my life understood what I went thru because he had someone in his family with the same illness. Do living with sickness stop yall from dating? Everyone doesn’t deserve to know. And everyone cant handle just what we go through on a daily. I have debated with this question in my head for so long. I’m at the point and saying screw love and my journey. I have had two friends tell me I’m wrong to think like that. Who knows maybe they’re right. I can’t hide behind my illness.
~TO BE CONTINUED~
When looking for love and dating. How do yall feel about them calling you sweetie, baby, sexy, etc? I’m not fond of it, just be honest. You don’t know me so don’t come at me with sweet talk. I feel like we have let them pass because we think its cute are whatever reason may be. Sweet talking doesn’t work on me. What happens to talk to the opposite sex with respect? If you correct them they want to call you a female dog. Why should I lose my worth because they have lost their dang mind on the correct way speak to me with some sense. Am I wrong for thinking like that. Fellas how do yall feel about woman calling yall sexy, handsome, etc?
Does love truly find us in odd situations? Do we find it or go looking for it? Do we wait? I was always told We first got to help ourselves. Is that true when looking for love? Or does that mean we should discover who we are, or get ourselves out into the dating world? Can we truly find love online? I decided to give it a try. I don’t have high hopes for it. It’s good and bad in every situation when dealing with dating. How do you know when to go for it or step away. I’m putting my FAITH in GOD. He’s going to lead me. I also wonder if love could be really for me.
~TO BE CONTINUE~
Getting my toes wet and seen what it’s all about. Join me on my Journey, do share some of your experience are thoughts with me. Until next time. God Bless
I had to wait for my heart to heal.
I had to forgive myself
I had to learn to love me again
I never realize the hell you took me
Through
I couldn’t look at myself in the mirror.
I hated everything you took me through
I had to wait for my heart to heal
Boy you broke me
You destroy everything I was.
I had to learn to love me again
I had to have chat with myself
Teach myself you are worthy
I had to show myself
Who I was
That I was worthy
To be love
Boy
You showed me how strong I could be
Once reality kicked in.
I saw me returning to the strong woman
I once was.
I just had to wait
I had to learn to forgive myself
I just had to wait
To my heart heal
And I felt my worth
It was amazing
Feeling
To know my worth
To be loved
The way I loved you.
It’s an amazing feeling
To be healed
4.27.19
~PJ~Day 27. Feels good to express myself more and more after not writing for almost 2yrs. Do enjoy God Bless
When you going to see me for me
And not no one else.
I’m not them
I’m trying to love you
Baby
When you going to see me for me
Right now you breaking my heart
You see your past
And not your future
I can’t keep taking hits like this
Boy
When you going to see me for me
I’m here love you
I’m not trying to use you
I’m just trying to be the one for you
I’m trying to heal and love you
But all you do is shut me down
I can’t keep taking hits like this
My heart is breaking
I didny think loving you
Would be so much work
I’m just trying to love you
4.23.19
~PJ~
Day 23. I can’t even give you a story in the poem. Guess taking trips down memory lane really woke something in me write. Enjoy! God Bless
Poets Afterthought 