Posted in 2021, AWARENESS, Cancer, chronic illness, God, My Journey, my story, Sickle Cell Anemia, Sickle Cell Awareness

Living With Sickle Cell Anemia

Sickle Cell Warrior

Good Morning/Evening, I havent been feeling well for the past few days. I take it change of season. Some days I dont want to get out of bed, but hell who doesn’t have them days? On other days I just push through it and pray about it. Thats all I can do at times. I really do miss my dad. He would know what to say right now. Its another month and usually I get sick in October. But lately I been getting sick like every other month. I need to return to keto to be honest, it really helped me out . Have you every realize when you change your eating habit for the best, your body does so much better. I have slipped after losing my dad. But I must admit I’m not ready to leave this world just yet. So its time to get back on track. Another day in pain paradise. Not funny, but had to say it. When it comes to Covid, I make sure I dont go out if I dont have to. And I always wear a mask when I do step out, I care santizer and wipes. I dont do gloves because some stuff Im allergy to and same with diff mask as well. Its weird you never know what you allergy to until you stuck with having to have it around you or in your life constantly. I know I mention awhile back. I havent got the shot and I don’t plan on getting it. Im always careful and to be honestly I dont like been around people to be frank. Im more of a home body and I keep to myself. With this virus thrown at us it make us realize a few things. We tend to forget who and whats important to us. We have the opportunity to spend time with our love one’s. Thats a sore subject for me to be honest still. I still want more time to be with my dad. Covid didnt take him, the damn cancer rob him and us who love him. I always figure I would leave before him, but look I’m still here and his gone. Just thinking about it hurt

Posted in 2020, Cancer, chronic illness, Death, emotions, God, Mini Update, pain

Mini Update

Good Morning and Welcome to My World!!  I don’t know if I’ll return to blogging. My world has come crashing down on me.  I know it’s best to write then let it all build up on me before I explode. I lost my ole man on 6, cancer took him from me. I’m actually doing stuff to not think of him not bn here. But it’s hard when he was my hero. I finally wrote last night and it broke my heart. I know he in a better place but I just want him here with me. I did get a chance to tell him I love him the night before. He didn’t say it back he was hurting so bad. Omg to see him suffering was heartbreaking. I wish I could rewind time back to when he was healthy and strong. I know we’re not suppose to question God, but I wasn’t ready to let him go.  I knew deep down I was going loss him, but not so soon. I think I’m going end post here. It’s breaking my heart. I do pray all is well with each and everyone of you all. God Bless

Posted in 2019, chronic illness, God, Health, My Journey, My Life, Prayers, Sickle Cell Anemia, Sickle Cell Awareness, Update

Update

Hello and Welcome to My World. It’s been a week since I been home from 8-day stay. God is good. I was a worry for a while. Where should I start? Come to find out the accident put me in crisis. Not sure if I mention the ride to my check up on my hip. Let’s just say that ride was hell. My body was so on fire. Let’s just say I was glad I had arrived at the doc office but not really because I had to get an x-ray and I was already hurting. It took prob 10 mins to sign in and sit and wait to be called. I saw a person dress half-naked and I was like hope she doesn’t have sickle cell. We don’t like cold. A lot goes through my mind when I’m hurting while trying not to think of my pain. I got called to let’s just say I was not happy about getting back up and walking again. Finally made it to the back and let’s just say things weren’t going good. Got on the scale and went in a room and did that good stuff. Waited quietly for nurse practitioner and we’ll let’s just say it went to hell. She walks in and was like I have never seen you like this before. Oh, and I didn’t look good. I tried to hide how I was feeling but when you in pain it was hell. So she was like can u get on the table. Let’s just say had said a prayer before got up. And it went straight to hell. I didn’t want to be touch and it turned to move and tears fell. She was like yep never seen you like this going direct admit you. Let’s just say it didn’t go that way because the hospital was full. I was in the hallway in er part for 2 hrs before got meds and let’s just say it was supposed to be iv meds and got the pill. You guess it, it didn’t work. You would think a big hospital with 9 floors would have room. But nope. Anywho our waiting 6hrs in the hall to be admitted. Finally got put on the 5floor and settle in. Guess who hadn’t eaten all day till got in room at 5 or 6? Me. I had some great nurses and doctors. Seem always do when I’m in that hospital. It’s like every few years. I stayed on 5 floors, think maybe 2days. Things started going bad and oxygen was dropping and seem my lungs weren’t looking good. I ended up with acute chest, which can kill us. After I heard that was wrong. Started to panic but just prayed and became calm and call parents to let them know what’s going on. They couldn’t be with me since dad was in the hospital. Hey, I’m grown and actually like been alone. Long as I can call them and hear there voice everything going be ok. I got a move to.9floor pcu. That’s how serious things went and quick. The doctor had asked me have I ever had acute chest and I said yes once. She was like did you have cheat pain. I said no. That was alarm and she did an x-ray and come find out she was right. I had good nurses on 9 floors. They stayed on top of pain, before getting a move to the floor. Meds had got up to iv meds. Actually when sickle cell doctor find out what board said and let the doctor know. Guess she talk to them and things got to change and quick. Been on 9floor and receiving bags and bags of antibodies. Sighs. So wasn’t happy about that. Let me be real, it had been months since had pain meds. I like to go months without my pain meds if I don’t need it. Guess body wasn’t used to it and I didn’t feel like myself. I don’t know-how made it from bed to chair get comfortable. Why do they have beds that move in the hospital? Like you have been suck in. I know what into door few times going to. bathroom. Sucks when you getting fluids as well. It’s like hey let’s go to the bathroom, even after you just went. I hate sleeping with oxygen in the nose, and when came to checking and it was low they knew why. Got to the point when I did get out bed go the bathroom I wouldn’t put it back on. Let’s move on from the depressing part. Believe I was on 9 floors 3 almost 4 days. I was glad to be leaving the floor. That means I’m out of danger. Oh almost forgot to mention hip results, everything came back ok and not damage. Just bruise. Omg, I was so happy. Few days that pain was gone, just other stuff had worry about. I moved to the 4 floors once leaving 9 one. A couple of days there and I was a free woman. Lol. On the second day when met doc n, not his partner. My room was full n had student doctors. Let’s just say I’m good on all them looking at me and the room was full. He asks was it ok and said no and he sent them out. Thank God. It’s a plus when the doctor listens to you on everything from how you feel and what you take for pain. They were surprised to find out what I had been doing for pain. I may have a serious illness, but I don’t want to be defined by it. On my good days, I don’t think of having sickle cell. You probably thinking to say what. We like being treated like we’re normal like everyone else who’s not living with chronic illness. Oh, yea almost forgot I did end up getting 1 unit of blood, let me just say I really didn’t want it because of what happened last time. Guess went good, I did scratch but that because of meds. I didn’t get blood till I was in my low 5’s and was getting headache and feeling very weak and tired. My mom had talk sense into me when it came to getting the blood. The way she did it was the only way I was going agree. What would we do without our parents? Well whew, that was a lot to type and sorry it took so long on update. My dad is doing much better, not passing out when he cough anymore. He still coughing but they have him on some meds to help with passing out. He has started his meds for his cancer as well. Well, thank you for being patient and sticking with me on this journey. God Bless until next time.

Posted in 2019, Cancer, family, God, My Journey, My Life, Sickle Cell Anemia, Update

Update

Good Morning and Welcome back to my world. Finally made it to my sickle cell doctor and must say glad be back on some of my meds. So far my sleep is blah. I done got out of bed, so many times. Either use restroom or something to drink. I done fold clothes up, played a few games on my phone. Why Am I Up? I need sleep, like right now. Guess I took my sleep meds late and body is like oh no we ain’t with that. Sighs. Tossing and turning and dealing with pain.

As some of yall may know if you been with me for a while. My dad has cancer. Well, he had to have surgery back in November because one wasn’t shrinking. It was getting bigger. The surgery went well. Thank God. He went for a scan last week to see how the others are doing since starting treatment again. They shrinking but two of them. The doctor wants to go in and remove them. My dad was like like let me think about it. In other words, pray about it and talk to the wife about it. You know God is good all the time. No matter what you going through. I can’t imagine not having my dad. When we find out a few years ago. It was shocking. We could have lost him. I thank God for that doctor appointment after Christmas. His counts were low. We knew something was wrong, but never in million years, we think it was cancer. We had to literally tell him to go to the hospital. He needed blood because he was losing it, and to see what was going on. His primary was like it maybe its cancer or an ulcer.

My nephew just celebrated his 9 birthday these past weekend. They grow up so fast. Where has the time gone? He celebrated his bday at the bowling alley. Second year in a row. No bowling, he chooses the arcade and lazor tag.

Posted in 2014, 2018, AWARENESS, Death, fight, God, Journey, My Journey, My Life, poem, Poetic, Poetry, Sickle Cell Anemia, Sickle Cell Awareness

Warrior

So many fighting diseases behind
Close doors…
Breaks my heart to hear
So many losing the battle…
You see our smile,
But not know our pain.
Fighting to live.
Holding back tears
So many warriors dying
From sickle cell, lupus, ms, cancer
And so many other diseases…
I never consider myself a warrior
Warriors coming out the closet
And letting the world know
I’m not a shame, my disease isn’t me.
Warriors are the ones,
Who keeps moving when the
The world has turned there back on us…
Warriors
Keep marching to our heavenly
Father call you home.

4/10/14
PJ

Dedicated to so many falling warriors. Quit judging when you don’t know the whole story! God Bless. Feel as if I can add more.

Wanted to share it again for the month of September to bring more awareness to sickle cell since it was sickle cell awareness month. But as many of you may know I try to share it much as possible.

Posted in 2018, Cancer, change, Christian, Faith, family, fight, God, Update

Update

Hey, and Welcome to my World. Where should I start, I have tried doing update post since October when I got sick and ended up in the hospital for over a week. I even tried before the holidays. Almost had another hospitalization but I push through it. Two years ago in 2016, we got news my dad has cancer. What a blow to us. Many things ran thru my mind. Was severe was I going to lose him. How will we handle this as a family? It was a rough year and we made it. Two different treatment, the first one wasn’t helping. The second one well I did for a while made it smaller but when he went to check up at hospital nothing has changed. He on blood thinners but since he seems to be losing more blood they change his doses. Hope it helps. His getting transfusion every other week for past few months. Y’all know I know about them when dealing with sickle cell. I’ll make a separate post on me later on. I have learned so much about this blow. No matter what get throws at you. You can make it with faith, prayer. Things get rough but never give in to devil evil tactics. Some days my dad reminds me of me when I have to push myself when I’m hurting. I see aggravation at times, motivation to get better and fight. The different things we go through when dealing with health issues. We not only got hit with cancer, we also got hit with him having heart problems. Not just one blow but two. God knows how slow you down at times. Going end it here and hopefully finish with rest of update. Pray all is well who reads this. God Bless

Posted in 2017, Cancer, God, Health, Journey, Mini Update, My Life

Update

Good Evening World,

Its been awhile since I posted. Every time I would start this post, something always came up. Funny how life slows you down when you so determined to do something. This may not be the posy from months ago, but hey its an update post. My dad got good news a few weeks ago, the new treatment is working and cancer shrinking. God is truly good, even when you going thru your own storm. I have found a new primary doctor, hoping have a post about that before year out. Its almost Thanksgiving, I have a lot to be thankful for. I’m alive, not in the hospital, surrounded by loved ones. I’m free, I could go on. I pray each and every one of you all is well. Hope have a better update in future. God Bless

Posted in 2017, AWARENESS, Cancer, God, Health, My Journey, My Life, Sickle Cell Anemia, Sickle Cell Awareness, Update

Update

Good Morning, 

Where do I start, I have been out for almost a week. Still, not my best was glad I didn’t need blood. So that’s truly one good thing. I had a doctor appointment with my sickle cell doctor that Friday. Let’s just say they weren’t happy how I got treated at the hospital. My counts were worse than when I arrive. I truly believe they were trying to make room for other people be honest, that’s not a big hospital and truly not the best. I had some great nurses. I’m so thankful for all y’all prayers and comments.i have read them just hasn’t had the time to approve and respond. I have been working on schedule post for the days when I’m not at my best. Some days are better than others. Today is the fourth I pray everyone has a safe and bless one. If you don’t celebrate trust I do understand, just enjoy your day. I know I haven’t mentioned my dad in awhile, next week he hopefully takes his last treatment. Back to update at doc office, let’s say they weren’t happy that I got discharged so early. All I know wouldn’t want drive is ride a long distance when I’m in pain. So uncomfortable.  But I may have to keep that in mind, my health comes first. Seems when we try to do what we need do, we still can have mishaps and get sick. No matter what we do, things will happen to shake our world. I pray all is well with who all that lay they eyes on this message. No matter what you going thru, don’t stop. Push and push some more. God Bless

Posted in 2017, Cancer, Faith, family, God, Health, My Journey, My Life, Sickle Cell Anemia, Update

Update

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Hey and welcome to my world. It has been awhile since I posted an update on what’s going on. I had doctor appointment Friday morning, and miss it due to a blowout. But thankful we didn’t get hurt.  We got someone to help us change the tire, and then the spare was flat. We had to put air in it and made out a way to tire place, to get the two front ones replace. I was two hours late, and they were gone from the clinic. I was so ticked off since I hadn’t been feeling my best whatsoever. I was glad to get my labs when I call the number they gave me. My counts were so so. I was surprised it was high as she said, but she said it was low for the type of  Sickle Cell, but retic was high. Now I know why I been having the darn headaches I hate. What a way to start your birthday.  I know I mention in few update post on finding a new primary doc, well I have and can’t wait to meet her. I have never had a woman doctor. I had them while in hospital but not as primary or sickle cell doctor. I shall keep you’ll post. My dad had a test the same day I had a doctor appointment to see if the treatments are helping and he just find out Tuesday when he went back for his treatment. Let me tell yall God is truly good all the time. Not just cause he got good news but just cause it has made me realize not to take love ones for granted.  I hope everyone is doing good and in good spirits. Remember to let your loved one’s know you love them before it’s too late.  I know it’s not much of update since my thoughts are everywhere.

 

 

Many Blessings to you all… God Bless:)

Posted in 2017, Cancer, God, Journey, Strength

Letter to cancer

cancer-quote-1

Dear Cancer,

Why you had come ruining my family? We didn’t welcome you, nor ask for you. Honestly I never thought I would hear your name in my household. I was always out looking in, but now I know first hand the damage you can cause on someone I love. But you don’t care, how you came. Long as you settle within the body, and destroy it. I’m watching you take a toll on my ole man..you not going to win dis fight, nor will you break him.. me on the other hand you’ll succeed. I’m fighting to control my fight and to overcome stress. you created so many problems with your arrival. You almost won cause you came unexpected. I’m thankful God stepped in and covered the situation. I catch myself checking on you throughout the day to make sure you still among the living. I’m tired of you and honestly I’m ready for you to exit the way you arrive.

 

Sincerely Concern,

Daughter