Posted in 2022, AWARENESS, chronic illness, Death, Health, life, My Journey, My Life, Sickle Cell Anemia, sickle cell disease, Update

Update

Good Moning, It’s been a while since I posted. I do pray all is well with every one of you and thanks for joining me and sticking with me thru my silence. I have been struggling since losing my ole man (dad) and my illness hasn’t been the best. I have been out and in about every month and sometimes twice in some months. I must admit surprised I haven’t given up yet. I have been writing a little here and there. I have been thinking about coming back and every time I do I never know how to start my post. seems every time I say I’m coming back it’s an update and then something happens. Life is funny like that, to be honest. The last hospital visit was a week and two days. it’s funny because I was doing good without going to the hospital or been putting in. My third month showed me doesn’t matter how you take care of yourself. Sickle Cell wins. I can take meds and do stuff like I’m supposed and still it wrecks my life without remorse. I haven’t had the chance to take my trip since June which was for my bday month before. I suppose life is funny that way. Covid doesn’t help much either. I must say I’m glad I haven’t and pray I never get it. My thoughts or everywhere. I do pray all is well with every one of you. As of right now the doctors and I or working on a way that I can stay put in the hospital. I have a home nurse that will come out to see me if I need her. It’s crazy how life slows you down when all you want to do is run away and don’t look back. It’s a holiday and my ole man’s birthday is this month. Lord, I miss him so damn much. It still feels fresh and it’ll be three years on the worse month possible. A hint: I hate Father’s Day, hell the whole damn month. Grief is a hella pain. The memories aren’t the same. I can’t hug a memory. I can’t pick up the phone and call just to hear their voice one more time. At this moment, not feeling my best. the weather is getting cold so that could be the reason. I and my body have a love and hate for it.

Questions for ya’ll. How do ya’ll handle grief? I havent fully grieve because of making myself sick. I grieve a little each time im in my hospital. Might as well since Im already sick. I honestly dont want to hear its going to get better. I dont beliee that. I have some people who lost there father longer then I have and they still grieving. Do let me know what ya’ll have done to make it little easier. Many Blessings till next time. I pray its not months later.

Posted in 2022, Health, My Journey, My Life, my story, Sickle Cell Anemia, Sickle Cell Awareness, sickle cell disease, Update

Update

Another Update!!!!

Hello and Welcome to my world once again. It’s been a while and a lot has been going on. I don’t know where to start but I have been in and out of hospital almost every week. They weren’t listening to me. But I believe I’m on the right track now. I do have a check-up coming on in a few days. I truly had some good doctors that took the time to listen to me. Listen so good they made sure I was seen this week. It’s a blessing when God put the right people in your care. This month has been rough for me. I know for a fact, I’m not ready to stop living. So it’s time to fight.

Sickle Cell Update…

I have been having trouble with my heart rate getting high for no reason. Then my blood pressure got high as heck. 175/100. I was going thru it, to be honest. I wasn’t stressed The only time I would stress is if certain people would call with nonsense about stuff I can’t do anything about it because I’m sick. It’s crazy how they want to bother you when you are down? Anyways my counts ended up dropping and had to have blood. Just thankful it didn’t take me long like a month or two ago when dropping to 5.4. God knows how to slow you down. I truly have lost my way. My faith has been shaken. I’m working on finding myself again. Meaning spiritual and emotional and physical. I’m ready to start living again. I know the last visit I had started blogging and sharing more. But it was hard to focus thru pain and meds so gave up. I may share them still but as of now not sure about them. Going to cut the post here because tomorrow is doctor appointment and hoping to share more. I pray everyone us well and safe. God Bless

Please forgive me for the visits. Let me get myself together and I catch up soon.

Posted in 2022, chronic illness, My Journey, My Life, pain, Sickle Cell Anemia, Sickle Cell Awareness, sickle cell disease, Update

Update

January update (2021)

Hello and Welcome to My World, thank you for the follows and likes. I know I have been slipping with my post and visiting. I’m trying y’all. I was sick a few weeks ago and so many times I wanted to pick my phone up and blog. Half the time I couldn’t even focus because of pain and meds. I do want y’all to see the good and bad side of my illness. But when I’m hurting so bad and sick they were staying on top of my pain. It started to get worse once they couldn’t find my blood type. Well not find it, it was stuck up in VA because of the snowstorm. My counts got low as 5.4. It’s a blessing they find blood in my state. Let me say this if you can donate blood, please do so. You are saving someone’s life. I understand if you can’t because of illness or whatever it may be. Anywho back to what I was saying. I had gone in because of chest pain and other areas hurting.  Never thought they going to keep me and I be in here damn near two weeks. They started looking for my blood soon as I got in to be on the safe side because I have antibodies and so I would have to wait and looked still had a wait. I was happy with my mom was able to visit because it would’ve been my ole man and they weren’t letting people visit months ago. She said I couldn’t understand you because the meds had me out of it. I have a praying mother, I was at peace because I knew everything was going to be alright. God had me. I was hooked up to heart monitors and this and that. That should’ve told me I was sick. It’s crazy how you think it’s something minor and ends up major. I had some good nurses and some nurses I wanted to smack because she didn’t know her job. It seem like every time I would move to go to the bathroom my port needle would come out. One time did it when I wasn’t plugged into anything. The next time it did it was when I was getting blood and messing my favorite gown up. I’m not used to needles coming out my port. It let me know whoever did it, didn’t do a good job. The nurse panicking and freaking out was making my anxiety go up. She was acting crazy than I was when it was happening to me. It’s when she lost her mind and want to yell and had clear my throat and give her a look.  Don’t do me know well get out of pocket when I’m sick. At end of the shift she didn’t listen to me about my ankles swelling and told the next nurse she says there swelling but threw not. Guess what my ankles swell a lot. I know my body.  I am thankful I didn’t get her again. I’m glad to be out but must admit not feeling my best. Was glad to have a doc appointment today. My heart rate has been high as 131 or even higher. Usually, go to ER, next thing I know I’m put in. It was all high today and so was my blood pressure, she had to retake it after I left. I didn’t want to get admitted over there, I will be too far from home and my mom is sick with covid and can’t come to see me even if I was close.  She gave me the flu swab negative and darn covid test, that be negative as well. I have wait two days because they were out of the rapid test. I have to get an x-ray tomorrow on my chest and hip. I bn dealing with back pain and when I got up my hipshot pain all way up and I was limping. I didn’t think it had been almost ten years. I’m still having some pain in my chest and back. We checking to make sure it’s not pneumonia. I didn’t want to be touched anymore today because I was hurting already. Hopefully tomorrow I will be up to another update because this is a long post. I’m going to get myself some rest until next time stay blessed and warm and safe. God bless

Posted in 2022, God, Listen, My Journey, My Life, Update

New Year

New Year (2022)

It’s been a while since I blog and shared much. I pray everyone made it in 2022 safely. 2021 was a rough year, still struggling with losing my dad. I haven’t been the same since he left last month was rough because of the holidays and his birthday. I must say if you still have your father in your life, do cherish them. I know we have to leave this world one day, but it’s a different hurt when there’s your rock. I had a few hospital visits due to my illness. The majority was good to visit and one wasn’t. I always think it’s funny when they try to tell me about my illness when I leave it for over thirty years. I’m going to try this blogging thing again and try to be consistent. I have been writing a lot lately just getting stuff off my mind/heart. Until next time I pray all is well and God Bless

Posted in 2021, Bless, chronic illness, God, My Life, my story, Update

Update

UPDATE.. LIFE

Hello and Welcome to my World. Its been awhile since I posted and read comments. I have been through a lot meaning to my emotions and still trying to get over losing my Ole Man{ dad}. Its rough when you a daddy girl. Its getting better but still is a struggle to be honest. I have been in hospital a few times. Its weird not having him here when he was the one I usually counted on when something would happen to me. I’m thankful last visit wasn’t long there was more concern about me getting covid then anything. I went awhile before I even step foot near the place since my area was getting it bad and they had sent extra help because of it. I did have to get blood that I wasn’t happy about. One of these days it can kill me instead of help me. Even though I haven’t blog much I have been writing here and there. I’m also thinking about where to go from here. i need go back to school and finish my last year and i still want to blog and educate people on my illness. I cant believe how many people have follow my journey because of the fact I have shared so much. Its a blessing that so many of you care and willing to learn. I still want to bring more to ya’ll. my fight isn’t over yet and its not easy. I must say I haven’t had any bad experience lately. I know the last time I went i got someone I wasn’t crazy about because they don’t know anything about sickle cell. She was making it seem like I had Covid instead of listening to me , I have made it clear that I don’t want her. If you not going to listen to the patient why be in the field period? Another season has come in and pray everyone is staying warm/cool depending wherever you from. I pray everyone is staying healthy as well. No matter what we going through God is still good all the time. Till next time God Bless

Posted in 2021, Journey, My Journey, Sickle Cell Anemia, Update

Life Update

Good Morning/Afternoon/Evening. It’s been a while since I posted and must say I missed it and y’all. Every since lost my dad I have been lost and drowning and was so angry.  It’s been a year unfortunately and he still not here with me. All I have left are memories. Thank you all who stuck with me and newcomers. I have been missing writing and visiting y’all. I have been writing here and there, just clear my head. But not on here. It says I have been blogging here for 10 years. Wow, that’s been a long time. Word press truly became home for me.  It has become a place for me to share my journey with my illness. The good and bad. I never thought I would touch so many people live through my experience but I have.  It hasn’t been easy. It hasn’t been easy since my dad been gone. I don’t have him here anymore to pray for me and talk to me and just be here. I haven’t truly grieved so I do it Lil bit every time I’m in the hospital. I thought about blogging each time I’m in but never have the energy to share anymore. Hoping to find my way back to sharing more of my life and read about y’all journey. I pray y’all are well and covid hasn’t got y’all down and out. Do enjoy y’all summer but make sure to drink plenty water. It’s hella hot in south. Pray all is well with each and everyone of y’all. God Bless

Posted in 2019, AWARENESS, chronic illness, God, My Journey, My Life, Sickle Cell Anemia, Sickle Cell Awareness, Update

Living With Sickle Cell Anemia

Good Morning and Welcome to My World. It’s been a while since I posted about my illness. I’m trying to do better. Today isn’t a good day. Not feeling my best. I don’t know if it’s the rain or the season change that got me hurting. Usually, I tend to go in crisis around this time every year. I have been avoiding going to the ER. I may need to put my big girl undies on and go and get check out. I had a doctor’s appointment last week. I didn’t really get blood work done and wasn’t feeling my best then. They were more concern on a check-up from the last visit when I got admitted for 8 days. And make sure my kidneys are good. No news is good news, right? She would have called me and let me know what’s what so I’m glad they are ok. Last time I went to ER let’s just say the woman nurse practitioner was an idiot. My counts were in the 7s so she going tell me I wasn’t in a crisis and was going to discharge me. I look at her and said fine. Just cause my counts shows and looks like that don’t mean anything. Let’s just say I stayed in a crisis for two whole weeks. I made sure to call sickle cell clinic to let them know what was going on and for my pain meds. I tend to go without them but when pain is bad I let them know. She wasn’t happy about the woman saying I wasn’t in crisis. The month of July did a number on me so I was trying to go cold turkey. I don’t see doctors till next year. I’m hoping I don’t need them till then. God has been good to me even on the days when in fed up with the pain. I’m thankful. I’m also thankful for y’all sticking with me, as well as the new people who have to join my journey. Bare with me, haven’t forgotten about y’all. I did read a few posts a few days ago. It’s going to take longer when I’m taking meds for my pain. Until next time. Pray all is well with each and every one. God Bless

Posted in 2019, chronic illness, God, Health, My Journey, My Life, Prayers, Sickle Cell Anemia, Sickle Cell Awareness, Update

Update

Hello and Welcome to My World. It’s been a week since I been home from 8-day stay. God is good. I was a worry for a while. Where should I start? Come to find out the accident put me in crisis. Not sure if I mention the ride to my check up on my hip. Let’s just say that ride was hell. My body was so on fire. Let’s just say I was glad I had arrived at the doc office but not really because I had to get an x-ray and I was already hurting. It took prob 10 mins to sign in and sit and wait to be called. I saw a person dress half-naked and I was like hope she doesn’t have sickle cell. We don’t like cold. A lot goes through my mind when I’m hurting while trying not to think of my pain. I got called to let’s just say I was not happy about getting back up and walking again. Finally made it to the back and let’s just say things weren’t going good. Got on the scale and went in a room and did that good stuff. Waited quietly for nurse practitioner and we’ll let’s just say it went to hell. She walks in and was like I have never seen you like this before. Oh, and I didn’t look good. I tried to hide how I was feeling but when you in pain it was hell. So she was like can u get on the table. Let’s just say had said a prayer before got up. And it went straight to hell. I didn’t want to be touch and it turned to move and tears fell. She was like yep never seen you like this going direct admit you. Let’s just say it didn’t go that way because the hospital was full. I was in the hallway in er part for 2 hrs before got meds and let’s just say it was supposed to be iv meds and got the pill. You guess it, it didn’t work. You would think a big hospital with 9 floors would have room. But nope. Anywho our waiting 6hrs in the hall to be admitted. Finally got put on the 5floor and settle in. Guess who hadn’t eaten all day till got in room at 5 or 6? Me. I had some great nurses and doctors. Seem always do when I’m in that hospital. It’s like every few years. I stayed on 5 floors, think maybe 2days. Things started going bad and oxygen was dropping and seem my lungs weren’t looking good. I ended up with acute chest, which can kill us. After I heard that was wrong. Started to panic but just prayed and became calm and call parents to let them know what’s going on. They couldn’t be with me since dad was in the hospital. Hey, I’m grown and actually like been alone. Long as I can call them and hear there voice everything going be ok. I got a move to.9floor pcu. That’s how serious things went and quick. The doctor had asked me have I ever had acute chest and I said yes once. She was like did you have cheat pain. I said no. That was alarm and she did an x-ray and come find out she was right. I had good nurses on 9 floors. They stayed on top of pain, before getting a move to the floor. Meds had got up to iv meds. Actually when sickle cell doctor find out what board said and let the doctor know. Guess she talk to them and things got to change and quick. Been on 9floor and receiving bags and bags of antibodies. Sighs. So wasn’t happy about that. Let me be real, it had been months since had pain meds. I like to go months without my pain meds if I don’t need it. Guess body wasn’t used to it and I didn’t feel like myself. I don’t know-how made it from bed to chair get comfortable. Why do they have beds that move in the hospital? Like you have been suck in. I know what into door few times going to. bathroom. Sucks when you getting fluids as well. It’s like hey let’s go to the bathroom, even after you just went. I hate sleeping with oxygen in the nose, and when came to checking and it was low they knew why. Got to the point when I did get out bed go the bathroom I wouldn’t put it back on. Let’s move on from the depressing part. Believe I was on 9 floors 3 almost 4 days. I was glad to be leaving the floor. That means I’m out of danger. Oh almost forgot to mention hip results, everything came back ok and not damage. Just bruise. Omg, I was so happy. Few days that pain was gone, just other stuff had worry about. I moved to the 4 floors once leaving 9 one. A couple of days there and I was a free woman. Lol. On the second day when met doc n, not his partner. My room was full n had student doctors. Let’s just say I’m good on all them looking at me and the room was full. He asks was it ok and said no and he sent them out. Thank God. It’s a plus when the doctor listens to you on everything from how you feel and what you take for pain. They were surprised to find out what I had been doing for pain. I may have a serious illness, but I don’t want to be defined by it. On my good days, I don’t think of having sickle cell. You probably thinking to say what. We like being treated like we’re normal like everyone else who’s not living with chronic illness. Oh, yea almost forgot I did end up getting 1 unit of blood, let me just say I really didn’t want it because of what happened last time. Guess went good, I did scratch but that because of meds. I didn’t get blood till I was in my low 5’s and was getting headache and feeling very weak and tired. My mom had talk sense into me when it came to getting the blood. The way she did it was the only way I was going agree. What would we do without our parents? Well whew, that was a lot to type and sorry it took so long on update. My dad is doing much better, not passing out when he cough anymore. He still coughing but they have him on some meds to help with passing out. He has started his meds for his cancer as well. Well, thank you for being patient and sticking with me on this journey. God Bless until next time.

Posted in 2019, family, God, life, My Life, Update

Update

Hello and Welcome to my world. If you celebrate the 4th, hope you enjoy it and be safe. Today we’re just resting. Two days ago I and my parents were in an accident. I never been in one and let’s just say my life flash before my eyes. God is good, it could’ve been worse then what it is. We didn’t hit anyone. My dad lost control. We couldn’t wake him and I and mom went in panic mode. I was the only one not buckle in. All I was thinking about he wasn’t waking up. We had to grab the wheel before we hit a house. We swerve into an open field and was just speeding. we ended jumping a ditch and almost into another one. So thankful we didn’t hit the pole. As some of you all may know I had a hip replacement a few years ago. I was worry I had did damage to it. My hip was in a lot of pain and my head and neck. My dad came around once it stops. So thankful we had help. So many people came to check on us. They saw the whole thing and somebody calls 911. They were asking if we were ok. They stayed till firetruck and ambulance and police. I rode in the ambulance. Not crazy about them, but it was a short ride. it’s weird how long you have wait be seen when you did had to wreck. So thankful my favorite guy was working. He made sure her x-ray order in and ct scan. As of right now my hip not looking so good. Everything came back good, but I’m walking funny. And was told first x-ray can miss something. I’m scared of what x-ray will say. Sickle cell appointment coming up so we shall see what going on. Other then dad seems my dad has something call syncope. When he coughs at the time he passes out. Thank God it’s not behind a wheel. So no driving for him no time soon. We hope to find out more this weekend are Monday. He did the fine day after the wreck, all of a sudden he’s doing it again and more then once. This is something new to him. We wondering if it has something to do with his new cancer meds treatment. I will keep y’all updated. Until next time. God Bless

Posted in 2019, AWARENESS, chronic illness, Health, Heart, Mini Update, My Journey, My Life, Sickle Cell Anemia, Sickle Cell Awareness, Update

Living With Sickle Cell Anemia

Hello, and Welcome back to my world. What a day I had. What I hate about doctor offices is to wait. I did mention had an appointment both days. Let’s just say Monday was a waste of time and gas. They went prepared for my arrival and didn’t want to see me because they didn’t have paperwork from the hospital, which I didn’t understand. You knew about for over two weeks. Always away from that. I arrive on time for both appointments. They did apologize but still, I was not happy. You are my primary doctor so it wouldn’t kill you to finally see me in person. Nope, I see my other doctors more then I see primary. Haven’t even met her yet. Yea something wrong with that pic big time. My sickle cell doctor was the most important for me to see. I had called in the week before explaining to them what had happened when I was in the hospital. I wanted blood work and wanted my results. She set everything up for me. Soon as the appointment was over went next door to the hospital to get labs drawn from my port. So back to my appointment, hadn’t been seen since Feb. She was like you good. I know I haven’t mentioned here before. I have changed my diet. I went keto and it has helped me a lot. Kept me out of the hospital. Lost over 60lbs. When on chemo meds for my sickle cell I had gained weight and couldn’t lose it. Then the new meds for sickle cell. It was making my head and back hurt. And I couldn’t deal so I stopped it. I had to first help myself and I have done just that. I honestly did my research for about 4/5 months before I went for it. I don’t have a gallbladder. Anywho back to my appointment.she check my heart and says sounds good. She asks me about meds she wanted me to start last time for my kidney. Told her I hadn’t started it yet. Since my body is doing overtime then a person without sickle cell. So she changes the mg since I’m smaller and started it last night. Never happy about trying a new medicine. So next visit we will see how everything looking. I’m putting it in God’s hand that everything is good and I won’t have to take it forever. I was glad I didn’t have a long wait for a tech come do my port. She was a nice woman and we talk while she did it. I always like to get to know whoever is dealing with me. I hate for my port get infected. I finally got my result around 5 and no new antibodies praise God. White counts were good. Retic little high but it’s be expected since my counts 7.6. It’s the best but it for sure not the worse. Praise God. Also, find out my bones in my back are deteriorating. It explains a lot when I’m going into crisis. Just a few days ago, I couldn’t move because I was hurting so bad. I read other sickle cell patients having the same problem. But so wasn’t expecting I had it. With so many people dying from my illness. I want to share my illness with y’all. Until next time pray everyone doing good. Stay Bless