Posted in 2014, AWARENESS, Faith, God, My Journey, My Life, poem, Sickle Cell Anemia, Sickle Cell Awareness, Strength

Against All Odds

I learn to fight
I shed tears, question
Myself if I was meant for
These journey with Warriors
Against All Odds.
God showed me just how..
Strong I was to be Warrior..
He knew what he was doing
When he created me
Against All Odds .
I showed strength, when I wanted
To give up
God showed me love…
In the midst of storm
He showed me I’m nothing
Without him..
Reminded me to hold on to
Faith…
Against All Odds..
4/18/14
PJ

Dedicated to my journey of life. No matter what you going thru his right there in the midst! Don’t stop fighting/ believing in him..No matter my odds, God had everything in control… Not sure if I’m happy with this piece, do let me know what you think 🙂

I’m re sharing poems dedicated to my illness to the end of month since its sickle cell awareness month. I do have new one’s I hope to put up real soon, so do bare with me. If you don’t like rereading different post that’s fine as well. God Bless;)

Posted in AWARENESS, family, Friends, God, My Journey, Sickle Cell Anemia, Thankful, Update

Living With Sickle Cell Anemia

thumbnailSCDHello Everyone,  I’m finally home, been home for a few days now, spending time with my love one’s. Getting much rest as possible. I must admit I’m so glad to be home, so can’t wait to be feeling my best. I usually would have this post up already, but still not 100 percent. I’m hoping sometime this week to know if my blood count has went up some more. Before I left it was still in the 5’s and we all know that’s not good. I must be honest with you all. Only Lauren knows whats going on with me. Right now I’m not doing good. I was supposed to have surgery on my birthday to have hip replacement, due to my illness. But that’s when I find out I had warm antibodies in me, because I done had so many transfusions, that’s why I can’t have anymore right now. I have been on the meds for over a month,and there not doing anything for me. I’m getting a lil discouraged, I must admit that to you all. I have been at my lowest last week and wanted to throw in the towel. I don’t know if it’s because I was just tired because of my health, and everything just wasn’t going my way or just cause the devil was just trying to get the bet of me. I believe it was a little of both. I’m not thinking that anymore. I know God isn’t finish with me yet, I’m here for a reason, so I need to continue to hold on and continue to fight to he calls me home to be with him. I’m so touch and feel so much love by all of your comments and prayers, it truly meant so much to me. I got to many visits from family and love one’s and calls from my best friend and TN, y’all thank you for praying for her mom her who had a stroke, she is doing so good. She has been there for me and so has her brother. They  have been keeping me laughing and if I couldn’t sleep staying up with me, and just praying for me. I couldn’t ask for two great group of lovely souls than them two. God knew what he was doing, he knew I couldn’t have that surgery for a reason on 5.21.13, I had to overcome this obstacle last week, and I can’t wait to im fully over it. I can’t wait to I can share more with you all. I need my rest and to stay on top of my studies, you all know how much I hate to be behind on my studies. God is truly good. I want to say thank you again. Thank you for joining my JOURNEY, and been part of my blogging family. I pray all is well with each and every one of you. God Bless. Sending love and hugs to each and every one of you. God Bless 🙂

Posted in family, poem, Poetry, Prayers

Prayers

This is for the one’s in need.

The heartbroken mothers worrying

about their child.

Already lost one, to a serious illness

Praying for different outcome with

the only one living

It could be your family.

If we pray together we can

make a difference.

Lets bow our heads

in prayer

3/14/12

PoeticJourney

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I actually wrote the poem before I get sick, I was actually in Wal-Mart handling business and women working there came up looking upset and worry and was telling her coworker the news, truly broke my heart. She was near tears then. God Bless Each & Everyone Of You All! 🙂

Posted in Faith, God, Health, My Journey, poem, Poetry, School, Sickle Cell Anemia, Update

My Story

Has taking me places I never thought it would be going.

Only honesty can get me out of this right now

So to my kind followers

Lately I have been losing

courage to share my JOURNEY

with you all.

It seem like I’m ready to throw

in the towel and ready to give up

All I want to do is cry,scream,yell

and hide under the covers in

the dark!

This is My story

2/22/12

PoeticJourney

I was going to put it in a poem, but I decided to just make it in a post to put all my thoughts in it! I hope you all brought your cup o joe and something to snack on as I share a little or should I say a lot with you. As of lately I have been in pain every single day since las Thursday! I enjoyed the few days of no pain.  Seems my blood count is looking good so they wont keep me. Sighs! I done read stories of other sickle-cell patients that in pain every day of they lives, but honestly that have never been me. My heart always went out to them, and broke. Yesterday I had one of my weak moments and just broke down and cried out and just wanted to be out of my misery. I know GOD got a purpose for me, I know he’ll take me out this WORLD when his ready! I’m just glad my blood count is looking good, but not happy about the pain I’m having and wish and praying that it will all go away. My doctor appointment didn’t go well if you all is wondering. His worry and I’m worry, his really want to get me into seen a sickle-cell doctor ASAP! So we can see what’s really going on with me. I feel like his giving up, and I know I wanted to give up. I just don’t want to since no one giving up on me or I get that vibe of them doing that. But I do understand if he can’t do anything for me I should see a doctor that can see whats really going on with me. I have good and bad moments. I have to tell you, I’m actually taking my time with this post. My classes have started again today, I thought I had another week but I do need something to take my mind off my pain. I even started playing Farmville on Facebook again, to pass time. I should read one of my novels I recently bought. I have done a lot of catching up on different blogs. Okay back to the point of my blog. I don’t want you all thinking I want pity, because that not what I’m about.  I never imagine MY JOURNEY would be rollercoaster, but GOD knew, so I’m going along with it! Some days I might not have much to share and some days I might have a lot to share. I actually have a class I have to retake because of being so sick last semester. Sucks, but for some odd reason I rather take it over then just make up the stuff I haven’t done.  After this semester I’ll be off to the FALL. Hopefully I have my illness in check and you all wont hear about me been in the hospital so much. I seem to be everywhere in this post once again. Lastnight I got so upset with the nurse, but she explain herself to me afterwards. I just want people to understand I HATE HOSPITAL/DOCTOR OFFICE/. I had a few good nurses last night, that took real good care of me. The nurse explain to me that I have so much going for me and she wants to know whats going on with me because she is use to take care of sickle-cell patients and she know I never use to come in as much as I have been coming in. I don’t blame her for thinking like that, but its a way to show someone you care so they can see where you coming from. I hope that made sense. Now I see what many sickle-cell patients go through when people think that addicted because they come to the hospital so often, hell if that was the case I would just go drop off all my prescription I have in my room and get them fill. I’m allerged to pretty much everything, so only can take one thing. Hmmm, and they keep giving me darn prescription for stuff I don’t like. Yes, I’m serious. Anyways away from that nonsense.  I’m so thankful for the encouragement and prayers, truly mean so much to me. You all just don’t know how much it keeps me going at times. 🙂 I know I’m not alone on this JOURNEY! I will not give up the fight, I’m trying to be more of ADVOCATE, something I truly always wanted to be. I know I keep tell myself I’ll do post explain what my illness is, do bare with me. I haven’t forgotten.

I haven’t lost my FAITH, not letting the devil get the best of me either. I know we all go through different things in life. I see my illness has been one of them as of right now. No limits to what GOD can do for me and any of us! God Bless 🙂

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Posted in My Journey, poem, Poetry

Shoulda,Coulda,Woulda

You my shoulda, coulda, woulda

hell.. you have become my

joy that I saw you for the real

person you…

To late to say…

Shoulda, Coulda, Woulda..

When you had me you didn’t

appreciate me..

Now I done move on

I’m glad to be with someone….

to love and cherish me

You crying and saying she

wont love u like I did….

I pray she don’t love like you…

Your love poison my soul…

Your infidelity destroyed me

I’m glad I finally move on..

So to your Shoulda, Coulda, Woulda…

You shoulda

cherish me when you had me

I coulda bn the one to heal your

damage and sick soul..

I woulda bn your rock to the

day we died..

You made me..

Your hubby..

Your friend..

when you already gave that

to another man..

You told me it was over and

now you knock up with his baby…

Did you honestly think

I would be your man??

You lied…

broke me down..

I was a pimp and

half a man..

Now im a King and

have recovery the

rest of me..

Damn I see I really

didn’t know you…

The age of a woman…

A mind of a child…

Dats truly insult to the

ones who don’t act

the way you do…

Shoulda, Coulda, Woulda…

Your obsession is an illness…

Cant you see I don’t give a damn for you…

It’s A shame you playing the fool that you

try so hard to replace me with…

You saying and Doing everything..

in your power to win me back…

Damn shame.. I don’t want you…

When will you get the picture and move

on…

Your stupidity is an Illness…

7/17/19/09
PoeticJourney

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Another poem dedicated to My Love Journey, its actually inspired by true events, but feel like I left something out, but could be wrong. You be judge and let me know.

Posted in AWARENESS, Health, My Journey, Sickle Cell Anemia

Recovering/Information On Disease

I seem to be stuck with cold ever since I got out the hospital and can’t get rid of it for some odd reason. I never had this problem before getting over cold. The New year is almost here and have two new doctors to see coming up in a few weeks. One is for my headaches I was getting all the time. I don’t get them as much right now, which is a good thing. But after doing more searching about my disease and learning about why I could be having headaches everyday. I learn something that  I didn’t know that it could be cause of a tumor. Since I’m the only one in my house hold with my illness, its good for me to study on it and learn as much as possible. You do know with seen the different doctors I do have, they never mention anything about me having tumors. I don’t know if that a good thing or bad thing, part of me make me think they don’t believe it could be that serious for me and then other is they probably know I can’t handle no more awful news. Also the other doctor appointment is about why I have so many antibodies in my body. Since its hard to find my blood type, I like to say thank you to each and every one of you whose been praying for me and still praying for me and who donates blood or know someone who does. Last time it didn’t take long to find my blood type. I was so happy! I was just in the hospital that long because of a slow ignorant doctor. Seem like he don’t know how to talk to a lot of people’s, and think people s have to take his lip and attitude. Thats a negative! Hey my mouth is working process.  I had a good  Christmas, wasn’t down in my body or stuck in hospital, did have a doctor appointment before Christmas. It went sorta good and sorta not. Yay for getting took off one medicine and boo for getting put on a new one that suppose to be better for my headaches. If you don’t take medication on every day basic, you or truly bless, and don’t ever take it for granted.  If some had read up on my disease because I havent made it back to do all that good stuff. That post should be up sometimes this week. Different ones with my disease can take the medicine to help them have less crisis, but to be honest I never really needed it before I got put on it when I was younger and it didn’t;t agree with me. I almost died in 06, so that’s when I got introduce hydroxyurea.  I usually take Folic Acid, that been working for me every sense well shoo forever. Seem like I’m everywhere with my post today. I’m pretty sure more to come this week, hate to bore all of yall in one post. 🙂

 

 

I do love all my followers, you have truly been a BLESSING to me on my JOURNEY, can’t wait to see how 2012 goes for us. Many Blessings to each and every one of you, like to welcome all my new followers, and say glad to have you on my JOURNEY, can’t wait to get to know each and every one of you as the year goes out and as the new year comes in. God truly knows what he doing when he seen certain peoples in your life that you never expect to make a mark on you.

Posted in AWARENESS, My Journey, Sickle Cell Anemia

Awareness

Am I wrong for wanting more Awareness for Sickle Cell Disease? I was recently talking to someone about my illness and she was like I didn’t know you had it and that she didn’t know much about it but wanted to know more about it. How can I spread the word about it and not get to emotional about not having much Awareness for my disease? I want to be Advocate, to be one that mean I would have to open up more about who I Am, and How I am living and dealing with it for over 20years? I didn’t know about we had a month of Awareness, to have a month but not really hear much about it bothers me. But someone had told me they heard about it and saw a few things as well.

To live everyday and to be in pain a majority of your life sometimes getting to the point and just being  unbearable. I smile on days I wanted to cry and just wish I wasn’t here anymore, but I knew it wasn’t my time to go yet. I know I haven’t blog much about my illness. I have been doing research on it for my English paper, so I have been learning new stuff each and every day. When I decide to spread more word on the issue I don’t want people  thinking I don’t know what I’m talking about. I know I haven’t made it back to explaining what it is yet.

You’ll see more on these topic of Awareness, it’s time for a change and I’m on my way of making it happen in due time. Right now days have been hard due to  my headaches getting the best of me at times.

GOD BLESS,

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POETIC 

Posted in My Journey, Sickle Cell Anemia

Living with Sickle Cell Anemia

Today isnt a good day. Finally cold weather is setting in, and
feeling it in my body! I havent spoke much on my illness because I have being doing some serious research for my paper and learning more about it myself! A few more weeks of school and a little break. Headaches getting worse, so havent being able to focus on my assingment like I want. I know I still have the entry to explain it, sad say I lose a lot of my work on my pc. I want to be ADVOCATE for SCD. So much to do in so little time. Im battling with myself right now, because I want to do so much or should I say Im doing to much! God give me strength!

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